For many years, I dated a guy that was intelligent, accomplished, and easy on the eyes. He always encouraged me to pursue my dreams & aspirations and he was often a tower of support. Intimate dinners, occasional vacation get-a-ways and organic sex were intoxicating. Total package…Right? Not exactly, he was emotionally and spiritually absent from the relationship. As time rolled by, I became restless with the uncertainty regarding where the relationship would evolve, specifically marriage. Whenever, the question of marriage arose he would gloss over the subject or reassure me that he loved and want marry me.
So, I accepted his verbal acknowledgement and settled for many more years. I settled for dinners, vacations, gifts and sporadic sex, knowing that I deserved more. Despite being in love, I had to sit with the reality
that I was consciously waiting for him to decide I was worthy enough. Sad but true. Another reality check was facing the fact that he was never going to marry me. I allowed him to take up residence in my life too long and he did not realize my value.
However, at the end of the day, I learned whatever I allow will manifest. Excuses, broken promises or dressed up romances masquerading as authentic happiness will manifest if I accept them as my truth. Moreover, discovering the power of clarity lies first with me was the biggest dating lesson. Stating up front what my expectations and requirements are from a man in a relationship eradicates miscommunication and ambiguous gray areas. The power of self-worth + clarity = less heartbreak.